When the door is shut....

This question has been stirring in my heart all day today. "How can I lead worship for others if I can't even lead myself in worship?" I just find myself realizing that I can't take anyone to a place that I haven't been myself with the Holy Spirit. The secondary responsibility of my role is to lead others in worship. What is primary is me worshiping in the quiet of my worship room when the door is shut and it's just me and the Lord. Sometimes this takes time, and you have to MAKE time to do this. I can be in worship for ten minutes and the manifest presence of God shows up, but sometimes it takes a lot longer than I would like. I just don't want to be one of those leaders who tries to take other people to a hypothetical place that I, myself have never been. I talk a lot about revival and awakening in worship but If I'm not proactive in pursuing it in my own life when the door is shut how can I lead others there with authority and authenticity. Jesus knew something about the secret place with the Father. Throughout the gospels Jesus made it a point to get alone with the Father because he knew this was where the cultivation of anointing and authority came from. Jesus said himself, "I only do what the Father does, and I only say what the Father says." This is huge because this very thing is what enables us to pursue Jesus' lifestyle. In Acts 2:22 it says that "Jesus is a man accredited by God to you through miracles, signs, and wonders." He is the Son of God yet He emphasizes the humanity of Himself as if to tell us that where the power and anointing lies is with the Father behind the shut door in a place of intimacy with Him. This is what is available to you and I.